well so far

This has been a fucking mistake. Maybe with another day he will be ok. Was ok yesterday and last night. Ate a good dinner. watched TV. Bill came over and talked, and interacted. Went to bed. Heard not a peep all night, yes I woke up every 2 hours, so I am a wee bit tired.

Comes time to get up this morning, I ask him to get up and get dressed, he apparently peed the bed last night. Well, that is where it begins. Refuses to get up, refuses to even talk to anyone other than to say get away from him. He is lying naked in bed, his nurse is past due for her visit. But what is the point if he refuses to get up. He is refusing his medication, I had to take hi purposely limp hand to get his sugar reading.

Is it dementia? Is it his lifelong stubbornness and meanness that is doing it? He will not even tell me if he is in pain. Won’t say a word. It is very very very frustrating. My heart is acting up big time since yesterday. The stress is through the roof. 

And I do not know what to do. No idea what to do at all. If I cannot get him up out of bed, how am I to get him to the doctor for a visit? How would I get him to a home facility? This is pissing me off too. Why is it MY JOB TO DO THIS?

I even have to give up visiting Jed today cuz of the asshole. I am getting more an more worked up the longer I type. so I will stop now. Do some cleaning or packing or whatever. Busy work. I hate this shit! I wish he had died back in April when he was on the floor.  It would have been better for everyone including him.